9/04/2005

If you need some motivation then do I have a suggestion for you...

Elliot has always had problems with constipation. I don’t want to bore you with the details but suffice to say it has been challenging for him and us from day to day and week to week and year to year.

Recently we implemented a newly named week for him, it goes like this: Sunday, Pooday, Tuesday, Pooday, Thursday, Pooday, Saturday and so on. We had to take this regimented approach after he was failing to poo after about 3- 4 days and then coming home sick from school - he has refused to use the school toilets since pre-school, plus it would take him up to ½ an hour it is all too difficult at times. We had to leave work to pick him up of course whereupon he would go to the toilet when home and was perfectly fine after that!

Part of Elliot’s problems in this area have certainly been behavioural as well as, initially physically. I have many times considered taking him to a professional to obtain some guidance but we have soldiered on and read lots and spoken to many other parents and Dr's (who really only recommended medication which does not augur well for a relaxed day at school).

Our latest regime, however, appears to be going extremely well (touch wood), and we have found ourselves having to remind him less and less to have a try. The other morning, he decided to go himself and as I was in the bathroom I decided to praise him to reinforce the behaviour and mentioned how proud I was that he was going regularly now and without reminding. We also discussed his methods for relieving himself as impaction had been a part of the physical problem in the past. ( I know this is too much detail for some of you and Elliot is going to absolutely kill me one day!)

Anyway Elliot replied that what he likes to think about when trying is that there are ants in his bottom and because he hates ants so much he tries to push them out as fast as possible. Naturally I was surprised and amused, indeed I had to contain myself from laughing out loud but said instead reasonably seriously that his idea sounded like an excellent way of motivating himself to get the job done.

So there it is some motivation for anyone who might be suffering with this problem - just think of the creature you dislike the MOST in the world, imagine it is inside your bottom and away it and you will go!

3 Comments:

At 6:35 pm, Blogger Suzette said...

Just wanted to say thank you! Thanks for sharing this despite the fact that Elliot whould have a fit if he knew (I know my little boy would be mortified at what I've written about him). He refuses to poo in a toilet at all and demands a nappy even though he will be five in three months. We've had lots of advice and have been told by several 'specialists' that we just have to give him time and make it a non-issue. I am hoping that when it does eventually happen that it doesn't turn into the type of issue that Elliot has, but now I know what to suggest if it does!

 
At 8:18 pm, Blogger Lushlife said...

Hi Suzette, we found that when we left the issue alone that is when he fails to go for days so we have to discuss it with him most days. I have even been hostage for an entire day by Elliot and a giant poo - that was one of the lowest days of my life I just didn't feel like I had control of my life.

I have read to him in the toilet to keep his mind off of it, I have taught him the breathing techniques and held his hands much the same as you would do if giving birth to a baby! I have encouraged and bribed and ignored it too. I have seen him barely able to sit and walk without grimacing. I hope those days are behind (excuse the pun) us!

In my view he is/was so scared of the pain it has caused him when it came out that he thinks he has to keep it in instead - it has taken ages for us to make him believe that going when he feels the urge is going to save him from alot of pain later. He is pyschologically scarred from having a constipated system, he would have heaps of fibre and water in his system and yet it persists. He also by admission to his Aunty thinks it is disgusting!

So I think it is a complex problem - and I hope that we are reaching its final grip on all of us. I wish you and your son the very best too. Toileting can be so frustrating and draining to deal with at times.

Though as I said lately things are going fairly well.

 
At 4:40 pm, Blogger Susoz said...

We haven't had any issues at all in this department and I credit my co-parent, who grew up (English) in India, where her father used to inspect their poo (for health reasons). So there was a lot of conversation about what the poo looked like and she has carried that over to our son - she would inspect his poos with him from when he was a toddler in nappies and helped him develop a vocabulary about it. He was consequently always interested in the event and not anxious about it, which has stood him in good stead. He goes every day and it's a non-issue. We have a friend with similar problems to your E, so it's fairly common. Anyway, I think talking about it does seem to be the way to go.

 

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